Lord forbid I try to make myself look presentable. 

Child thinks that sitting on my lap while I’m trying to do my make-up is helpful.

This is how it went:

Child: can I sit on your lap?

Me: not really… 

*child sits on my lap*

Child: can I do your eyeshadow!?

Me: no.

Child: why?

Me:(internally) because bedraggled drag Queen isn’t the look I’m going for today. (externally) because it’s just for grown ups

Child: Oh. When I’m a grown up I’ll do make-up. 

Me: I’m sure you will. I love you. 

Child: I love Rodney (the dog)